Don't you hate it when ppl tell you to "DUMP HIM/ HER" as a solution to your problem?

I can understand why friends tell me to just dump him because they are just too lazy to listen to my story.





But I can't understand why ppl on yahoo!answers do it as well. Any thoughts?

Don't you hate it when ppl tell you to "DUMP HIM/ HER" as a solution to your problem?
It's always much easier for someone who isn't close to the problem - or to those involved , to be more objective , and to give sound advice . That's why advice columns like Dear Abby , or people like Dr. Laura thrive .


When the "dump him" advice comes from a friend - it's usually because what we have heard from one side ..is so bad.. that we can think of no positive reason to suggest as a reasonable solution to remain in the relationship . And usually , the story has been told a time or two and it's still the same one . .which usually begs the same answer : "dump the cad".. What I hate is to be put in an impossible position ..to advise love life to my friends..because we're darned if we do and darned if we don't .


That said ..I can see your point if a person does not know where you are coming from ..and goes "dump him" ..because it's insensitive to give advice prematurely ..or when it's unsolicited .
Reply:It may be that they honestly think the answer to your problem *is" to dump him.





Sometimes people keep looking for the magic answer and twist themselves into a pretzels and jump through hoops in an attempt get the other person in a relationship to treat them well. Sometimes the other person's behavior is so obviously disrespectful and uncaring, if not downright abusive, that "Dump Him" is the solution.
Reply:Nobody can make that decision... for you.. you know what kind of relationship you got.. and if you believe you have a relationship built upon mutual trust and love and mutal respect.. which I personally would strife for and expect and hope for.. but whatever you consider best for you and your relationship .. nobody but you can decide.. if you ask a question you have to accept different viewpoints or not ask at all.. And if you are happy with how things are then follow your own heart and instincts.... nobody is judging you and nobody can make such an important decision ever.. only you can.I pesonally don't know and never heard your personal story.. I only know that for women who need help and are in an abusive relationship a lot of them are afraid to leave because they think they have nowhere to go.. but there are places women can go to.. shelters and they can train for a new job... I don't say you should do that.. I mean some who have problems but these are just suggestions to those people if they ask for advice.. then there are ways out.. but I believe a person who is living with someone has to make his or her own choices.. all people try to say.. if someone wants to leave an abusive or emotionally abusive relationship.. there are ways.. and yes, it is hard. but so is being emotionally abused and I understand also that some cultures don't allow it.. they would turn their back on a partner who leaves the other partner no matter what the reasons so I never pass judgment.. I only say.. ''The person has to make his or her own choice .. we here only try to advice someone if they ask a question'' and that dump him or her is not always the best answer we all know that.. but to remain in an abusive relationship of any kind is very very degrading and horrible for the person who has to live in one... so all we try to do is offer suggestions but we don't pass judgment and the final decision has to be made by the person who asks a question.. meaning to follow his or her own heart and what she or he thinks is best under the circumstances xx..xxx
Reply:maybe they really think u desrve better